
Escape to Paradise: Worthing's Stunning Old Coastguard House Awaits!
Escape to Paradise: Worthing's Stunning Old Coastguard House Awaits! - My Messy, Honest, and Kinda-In-Love Review
Okay, let's be honest. When I saw the photos of the Old Coastguard House in Worthing, I half-expected a CGI-ed fantasy, all impossibly perfect angles and airbrushed sunlight. But guess what? Escape to Paradise? They weren't kidding. This place… it's got a vibe, and it’s one that hugs you like a warm blanket on a chilly Worthing day.
Now, before I gush (and I will gush), let's be practical. I'm not a travel blogger. I'm just a regular person who likes a bit of luxury, a good coffee, and a serious dose of chill. So here's my take, warts and all.
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First Impressions & Getting In (Accessibility & Arrival)
Finding the place was easy enough. And the car park [free of charge]? Seriously, a win. (Parking in Worthing can be a minefield). The elevator was a lifesaver with my (ahem) excess baggage – and a big plus for anyone with mobility issues. They also boast facilities for disabled guests, which, while I didn’t personally use them (thankfully!), gives me a warm feeling knowing they're considered. Speaking of accessibility… there's mention of exterior corridors, sometimes a bit of a hassle you know? But it’s what you get from some historical buildings I guess.
Rooms and Rest: Oh, The Bliss!
My room? Oh, rooms sanitized between stays – phew, that's reassuring in these times. From the blackout curtains (essential for a good lie-in) to the slippers (luxury!), it felt like a proper escape. I’m a sucker for thoughtful touches. The complimentary tea and coffee maker was an early morning godsend. And that extra long bed? Glorious. Honestly, I could have stayed curled up in there all day.
The Tech & Connectivity Debacle (Because Real Life)
So, the Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!? Yes! And it generally worked. But, and this is a small gripe (because everyone needs a small gripe): occasionally, I'd have to reconnect. But look, this is the real world, not a perfectly manicured Instagram feed. And the Internet access – LAN? Didn't try it, because, hello, I was on vacation! They claim to have Internet services but I didn't really test them.
Relaxation, Rejuvenation & That Damn Pool (Oh, the Spa!)
Listen, the Spa/sauna is where I basically lived for a day. The Fitness center? Tried to go once, but honestly, the siren call of the Pool with view was too strong. The view was stunning. And the pool itself? Not too crowded, which is a major win. They even have a Steamroom which I happily went to.
I skipped the Body scrub and Body wrap because… well, I just did. I was perfectly content, bobbing in the lukewarm water, and just staring at the Sussex coast. The Massage was divine. Absolutely divine. I'm not even going to try and describe it because words fail me. I can recommend it, though.
Dining – A Mixed Bag, Honestly
The dining situation was a bit of a rollercoaster. The A la carte in restaurant was lovely, but the buffet in restaurant? A bit… meh. I went to the Vegetarian restaurant once, it was a bit plain, but I'm not vegetarian, so I can't give you an honest opinion there. The Poolside bar? Perfect for a sundowner cocktail, though the service was a tad slow at times. The Coffee shop served a decent flat white. The Breakfast [buffet] was alright and offered a Western breakfast but the Asian breakfast sounded a bit ambitious for a Worthing hotel! The Breakfast service was a bit rushed, but I was probably in a hurry! The Desserts in restaurant were nice, and the bar boasted a Happy hour. The Restaurants were lovely, and I could have all my meals there if I wished.
Cleanliness & Safety (Because 2024)
Honestly, I felt safe. They’re clearly taking hygiene seriously. Rooms sanitized between stays, Hand sanitizer, and the staff were all masked. It’s not just a tick-box exercise here; it felt like they genuinely care. Plus, the Safety/security feature made me feel better.
For the Kids & More (Family Friendly? Yes!)
I didn’t bring children, but the hotel seemed pretty family-friendly. They offer Babysitting service and Kids meal.
The Nit-Picky Stuff (Because I'm Particular)
- The Room sanitization opt-out available is good to know.
- The Daily housekeeping was efficient.
- The Doorman always greeted me with a smile.
- Facilities for disabled guests are a great bonus.
- The Safe dining setup provided confidence.
My Verdict & That Persuasive Offer!
Okay, so it's not perfect. Nothing in life is. But the Escape to Paradise: Worthing's Stunning Old Coastguard House Awaits! has a certain je ne sais quoi. It's charming, it’s comfortable, and it's genuinely a place where you can unwind. It's not trying too hard. It’s just… lovely.
Here's my pitch (because you're probably here to be sold):
Tired of the daily grind? Yearning for a escape where you can actually switch off?
Book your stay at the Old Coastguard House RIGHT NOW!
Here’s what YOU get:
- Unwind: Immerse yourself in pure relaxation with access to our luxurious spa facilities, including a sauna, pool with a view, and expert massage treatments.
- Savor: Indulge in delicious dining experiences with a variety of options, from the poolside bar to the Asian and Vegetarian restaurants!
- Reconnect: Take advantage of complimentary Wi-Fi (with a little patience!) and breathtaking views to stay connected while you disconnect.
- Breathe Easy: We are committed to your safety with rigorous cleaning protocols, providing Anti-viral cleaning products, daily disinfection and trained staff.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
Book your escape today and receive a complimentary bottle of local Sussex sparkling wine upon arrival!
This exclusive offer is available for a limited time only. Don't miss out on your chance to experience the magic of Escape to Paradise! Click here to book your Worthing getaway right now!
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Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to go on a rollercoaster of a Worthing adventure. This isn't your glossy brochure itinerary, this is the real, messy, slightly-hungover-but-still-excited me, planning a trip to The Old Coastguard House. Grab a brew, prepare for tangents, and let's dive in!
The Old Coastguard House, Worthing: A Chaotic Coastal Capers Itinerary
Day 1: Arriving… and the Undeniable Allure of the Sea (and a Questionable Sausage Roll)
- 1:00 PM - Arrival & Utter, Unadulterated Joy: Okay, so picture this: Train chugging along, finally pulls into Worthing. Sunshine shimmering on the sea – actually, hold on a second, is that wind? Oh, yes, Sussex wind. But honestly, I don't even care! The air smells of salt and… fish and chips, and I'm practically bouncing with excitement. Finding our way to The Old Coastguard House, feels like a proper escape. That Victorian facade? Sigh. Perfect. I, of course, immediately run upstairs (after dropping my bag) to test the ocean view from the window. Success! This is going to be brilliant.
- 2:00 PM - Settling In & the Great Sausage Roll Debacle: Check-in hiccup? Nah. More like a triumphant "WE'RE IN!" Our room is adorable, surprisingly spacious, and has actual proper teacups. I have a strong fondness for teacups. First order of business: find provisions. We stumble across a local bakery. The smell. Glorious! Sadly, I got a questionable sausage roll. It was lukewarm and… well, let's just say it didn't tickle my tastebuds. Lesson learned: always check the internal temperature of a baked good!
- 3:00 PM - Coastal Walk of Dreams… and Blisters: Right, time to embrace the glorious seafront. I'm determined to walk all the way along the shore, even if it means my feet scream at me. The pier is magnificent, the wind whipping my hair into a frenzy, but I love it. Observe: a couple having a picnic, looking effortlessly chic. I, on the other hand, end up with sand AND ice cream all over my face. Elegant. On the plus side, the pier is gorgeous at golden hour.
- 5:00 PM - Pub Time & a Philosophical Pint: What trip is complete without a proper pub?! The Coastguard Inn is literally a stone's throw away. This is where I spend the time, staring at the waves and thinking deeply about the meaning of life but really, I'm just contemplating ordering a second pint!
- 7:30 PM - Dinner & Possibly Over-Ordering: Dinner at the hotel! The thought of not having to leave the coastguard house is comforting. I'm already drooling over the menu. Let's be honest, I'll be ordering the fish, the chips and possibly the lemon cake too. Why? because the coastguard house is a luxury experience!
- 9:30 PM - Stargazing & Existential Dread: Armed with a blanket and a strong cup of tea, I attempt to stargaze. The Sussex sky is surprisingly dark; the stars are twinkling. Here is when all the emotional reactions come in - I get a bit lost in contemplation staring at the star sprinkled sky. It brings up a mix of awe and utter insignificance. Wonderful feeling!
Day 2: Pier Pleasures & Finding Art (and Maybe a Slightly Embarrassing Incident)
- 9:00 AM - Waking Up to the Sea & Glorious Breakfast: Ah, the smell of cooked breakfast. The Old Coastguard House really does have the best breakfast (even if the sausage roll wasn't!). This time I opted for the full English, and I devoured every last bite. I practically skipped back to my room.
- 10:00 AM - The Pier: A Deep Dive & a Near-Disaster: The pier! I adore piers. There's a cafe, and of course, I go for a coffee. I spend a good hour watching the sea gulls, which is entertaining in itself.
- 12:00 PM - Art Appreciation & a Moment of Awkwardness: Worthing has an artsy side, and I'm drawn to it. The Worthing Museum and Art Gallery is a must-see. I feel sophisticated, I can't help but feel humbled. The Awkwardness? On the way there, I nearly tripped and face planted into a flower bed! I'm now thinking about the importance of being graceful. I'm not graceful, it's just a pure fact.
- 2:00 PM - Lunch & a Random Act of Kindness: Find a little cafe (after my near-disaster incident). The food is delicious and the owner of the cafe has offered to hold my bag while I "go to the loo". A small, sweet act of kindness.
- 4:00 PM - Relaxing at the Coastguard House I retreat back to the coastguard house. After a hectic day, it's nice to come back, and just relax.
- 6:00 PM - Sunset & Some Serious Contemplation: Watching the sunset – the colours are insane. I get emotional about the beauty of it all. Life - is good.
- 8:00 PM - Evening Stroll & a Final Pint: Final wander along the pier. One last pint. I get a bit weepy. This trip is amazing, I don’t want it to end!
Day 3: Departure… and a Promise to Return (Maybe with a New Sausage Roll Strategy)
- 9:00 AM - Last Breakfast & a Heartfelt Goodbye: Breakfast. Okay, one last full English, and the teacups are getting one last use. I say my temporary goodbyes to my view!
- 10:30 AM - Souvenir Hunting & a Touch of Panic: I decide I need to purchase some souvenirs. I get lost in a shop. Then, mild panic.
- 12:00 PM - The Train & a Sea of Memories: The train journey back. I stare out the window, clutching my souvenirs, and re-living the trip. Oh, the sausage rolls! I vow to perfect my assessment skills.
This is my trip. Messy, imperfect, full of genuine emotion and that undeniable pull of the sea. And you know what? I can't wait to go back.
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Okay, so... What *is* this "Escape to Paradise" anyway? Sounds cheesy, tbh.
Alright, alright, I get it. "Escape to Paradise" does sound like something you'd see on a bargain bucket brochure, right? But here’s the REAL deal. It’s this gorgeous, old Coastguard House in Worthing. Think… proper old, like it's witnessed a few storms and a *LOT* of seagulls. And it’s been done up, but in a way that actually makes sense! Not all sterile and boring "modern," thank goodness. It's got character. Loads of it. Imagine waking up and the *sea* is your alarm clock. That's the draw, really. The escape. A real one. Less "paradise" and more "sanity break needed, pronto."
So, it's BY THE SEA? Like, REALLY by the sea? I’m a beach person. A very, very beach person.
Oh honey, you've come to the right desperate, sun-starved internet search! *YES*. Like, practically *in* the sea. You could throw a starfish (responsibly, of course!) from the window and it’d probably land on the beach. You know the smell of the ocean? You can practically taste it in the air. Honestly, the first morning, I just stood there, mouth slightly open, just *inhaling*. And yes, I *am* a beach person. The kind who drags buckets of sand home, the kind that smells of salt for a week. You'll feel *at home* there. Just... watch out for the seagulls. They’re the kind that will steal your entire sandwich. Ask me how I know…
Okay, the place itself? Is it actually *nice*? Because some "renovated" places are just… ugh.
"Nice" is a massive understatement. I'd say "bloody lovely." It's not just about the decor, though it *is* lovely. It’s the *feeling*. The whole place is just… calm. You know when you walk into a place and you can just *breathe*? It’s that. They've kept the old charm, like exposed beams and cozy nooks, but with modern stuff. Good showers! Comfy beds! Which, after lugging all my stuff out, I was ridiculously grateful for. I'm still dreaming about that bed, actually. It might have been the sea air, it might have been the sheer relief of being *away* from my demanding laptop, but I haven’t slept that well in *ages*. The only downside? Leaving the door open so you can hear the waves, then *realizing* the wind is howling through the house and you're freezing your butt off at 3 am. Worth it, though! Absolutely worth it.
Are there any downsides? Because nothing’s *perfect*. (Unless it’s a perfectly cooked croissant, which, on a side note…)
Okay, okay, here's the truth bomb. Worthing itself, while charming, is not exactly the height of nightlife. It's more "a nice pub and a quiet evening" instead of "dance until dawn." And the parking situation can be a *nightmare*. Seriously, circling the block for twenty minutes after a ten-hour drive is NOT how I wanted to begin my escape! Make sure you check the details for parking. Also, and this is a personal thing, the lack of a decent, high-powered hairdryer was borderline criminal. My hair looked like a sea monster after the wind got to it. But I'm nitpicking. The pros completely outweigh the cons. And next time, I'm bringing my *own* hairdryer. And a croissant.
Worthing itself… is there anything *to do* there? Or is it just a sleepy beach town? I need some entertainment, dammit.
Okay, yes, it's not London. But don't dismiss Worthing! There's a *lot* more than sleepy beach vibes. The pier is classic, you *have* to go. Arcade games, fish and chips, the whole shebang. There's a lovely art gallery, some great independent shops (perfect for buying gifts for yourself… obviously), and some really good restaurants. Honestly, the food scene surprised me. And you can easily day-trip to Brighton if you *absolutely* need a mega dose of something more exciting. But I found myself really enjoying the slower pace. I walked along the beach every morning with my coffee, I browsed in bookshops, I just... relaxed. It was glorious. My advice? embrace the quiet! Seriously. You probably need it. We all do!
Should I book this thing? I'm on the fence. (And the price…?)
Alright, the big question! The price? Look, it's not *cheap*. It's a proper escape, not a budget hostel. But honestly? For what you get – the location, the comfort, the view, the damn *peace* – it’s worth it. Think of it as an investment in your sanity. And trust me, you deserve it. Book it. Seriously. Before I do. I'm already mentally planning my return! I am a woman of simple pleasures. good food, a comfortable bed, and the sound of the ocean. This place delivered on *all* of them. Just… don't forget your own hairdryer. And maybe a padlock for your sandwich.
What amenities *are* provided at the house itself? I like my creature comforts.
Okay, this part I found pretty great. They’ve actually *thought* about it. Fully equipped kitchen, which, frankly, I barely used because I was too busy indulging in Worthing's delicious food options. But it's there! A comfy living room, with a *massive* TV (for those rare moments you emerge from your ocean-induced trance). Decent WiFi (important for, you know, bragging on social media about your gorgeous escape). And, crucial, a washing machine! I was able to wash that salty beach blanket. Plus, little things like towels and bedding are provided. Honestly, I packed way too much stuff. I’d underestimated the level of *thoughtfulness*. The owners have done a great job.
What kind of access is there to the beach? Is it easy, or a long trek? I'm not exactly an Olympic athlete, you know!
Easy access is an *understatement*. The door opens and you're practically *on* the beach. Like, a few steps, and your toes are in the sand. It's ridiculously convenient. Honestly, I think I spent half my time just wandering to the shoreline to stare at the waves. The only downside? The temptation to just stay there *forever*. It'sHotel Near Me Search

